Then

I came home
carrying a present
for you
in my hands.
And found out you
were gone.

'Accident'
I saw them say,
but I heard nothing.
My eyes glazed over,
my ears blocked
their voices.

And now
I know
they were right.
The eulogy,
the flowers,
the dirt.

I gave my present
to you.
To the earth
that now belongs
to you.

Photos bring
extremes of sobbing
then numbness
then sobbing.

Memories remain strong.

Your cheeky smile,
all that laughter,
the friendship-
I carry it
in my heart.
Its all I can do.